Lovely Valentine 1

“I thought we were supposed to be back to being friends!” Loz groused, bringing out dishes to the table.

“We are back to being friends!” Phoenix protested, following him with a large pot.  “And I’m telling you as a friend: It’s gross!”

“You’re gross!” Loz countered.

Phoenix stuck his tongue out.  The pair was helping to set the table for Christmas dinner in the huge hall of Shinra manor.  Friends and relations bustled around, helping, getting in the way, chasing children and pets – all the things that happened at a big family get together.

“Hey, if he was an officer, I bet Father knows him!” the little redhead announced.  “We’ll see what he thinks!  Father!”

Angeal Hewley looked over at his son.

“Yes, Phoenix, what is it?”

“Did you know a – what is his name?”

“Ian Jewel,” Loz provided.  “Major Ian Jewel.”

“Ian Jewel?!”  Zack gasped, still bundled up on the couch and taking it easy.  “Emphatically Major Ian Jewel?!”

“I thought he was just a legend!” Cloud said.  “All those stories can’t be true.”

“I . . . served under him,” Angeal admitted.

“You knew him?” Zack gasped.  “Was it true about the moose?”

“Yeah!  Yeah, that one was true,” Angela said with a grin.

“How about the Phoenix Down and the drum horse?”

“I saw that one!” Genesis stated.

“How about . . . getting stabbed by a Wutai assassin before a ceremony and refusing to get his wound treated until after the ceremony was over?” Cloud asked.

“I saw that,” Sephiroth offered.

“Okay, okay.  Defeating an entire regiment single handedly . . . with a tea service,” the blonde tried.

There was a pause as those gathered waited for eye witness confirmation.

“The thing about Major Jewel was when you saw the things he did, you couldn’t discount anything you heard about him,” Angeal said.  “He was proud, strong, a tactical genius, and completely insane.”

Phoenix made a ‘told you so’ face at Loz.  The big clone frowned.

“But you liked him, right?!”

“Oh, we loved him!” Angeal said.  “Major Jewel could walk up to you and declare himself King of the Moon and you’d carry him half-way there on your shoulders before the first question rose in your mind.”

“And the first question would be ‘How are we going to get to the Moon?’” Tseng offered.

“You met him, too?” Zack asked.

“Once.  He resigned from military service when ShinRa took over.  He delivered his resignation to the old President personally.”

“And he made that much of an impression?” Cid asked.

“He rode a horse into ShinRa tower, all the way up to the President’s office, and delivered his letter of resignation on the end of a cavalry saber that he drove into the desk.  So yes.”

“That sounds like Emphatically Major Ian Jewel.  Why were you asking, Phoenix?” Angeal mused.

“He’s coming to dinner,” Phoenix reported.  “As Loz’s date.”

There was a long silence.

“And I really like him and it’s getting serious, so nobody ruin it for me!” Loz blurted.

There was an even longer silence.

“Major . . . Jewel?  He has to be in his sixties by now,” Genesis mused quietly.  

Loz rolled his eyes.

“He’s not that old!  He’s only fifty-two!”

“Fifty-two?  Loz, you’re twenty-two!”

“So?  I really like him!”

“He’s thirty years older than you,” Tifa pointed out in dull horror.

“Thank you!” Phoenix said.  “Ew!”

“Not ew!” Loz said.  “The opposite of ew!  He’s great!  He’s sweet and romantic and the sex is incredible!”

“Blahaahaaaargh!” Phoenix yelled, clamping his hands over his ears.  “I don’t want to hear about your old  boyfriend and his wrinkly, old balls!”

“There’s nothing wrong with older men,” Lukis announced primly.

“I’ll second that,” Aeris agreed.

“Motion carried; we’ll put it to a vote!” Cid announced.

A titter of laughter ran through the room.  

“You really don’t have a problem with Loz dating a guy thirty years older than him?” Tifa asked, eyeing Sephiroth.

“I’m a little impressed, actually,” the Silver Tiger announced.

“Really?” Loz breathed, his face lighting up.

“Yes.  What does Major Jewel see in you?”

“I have no idea!” the big clone admitted.

He finally set the last two plates on the table, seeming not to notice the heat of the sizzling platters on his bare hands.

“Ian says I have a pure heart,” Loz admitted in a quiet voice.  “And I’m beautiful, and . . . calls me his toy soldier.  And he says my name is four letters away from being ‘Love Valentine.’”

If it were physically possible for someone to sprout floating pink hearts, Loz would have been doing it.  Cid made a gagging noise and stuck his finger down his throat.  Tifa swatted his shoulder.

“You hush!” She ordered.  “That’s sweet!”

“Well . . . Major Jewel always did appreciate large, well-built men,” Angeal mused.

Genesis turned to face his husband, brows raised.

“Nothing happened!” Angeal said quickly.  A little too quickly.

“Oh. My. Goddess!  You are dating a man who slept with my father!” Phoenix wailed.  “That’s so wrong!”

“Nothing happened!” Angeal insisted.

Before any more protestations could be voiced, a maid came in leading a very distinguished older gentleman.  

“Where’s my Lovely Valentine?!” he demanded in a voice like muted thunder.

Every military man in the room felt his spine straighten out of pure instinct.  Loz’s face lit up like a Christmas tree.  With a giddiness usually reserved for school girls, he rushed across the room and swept the newcomer up in a hug.  The man, presumably Emphatically Major Ian Jewel, was only a few inches shorter than the big clone.  He was a mountain of a man, still very fit, his black hair shot through with threads of silver.  After the hug, the pair shared a passionate kiss.

“eeeEeeww,” Phoenix groaned.

“Ian, this is my family,” Loz said, gesturing to the crowded room.  “That’s Sephiroth, his husband Zack, my brother Yazoo, um . . . that’s Phoenix . . . well, they all have names; you get the idea.  Everybody, this is my boyfriend, Ian Jewel.”

“What happy circumstance, to meet everyone who shaped the lovely Loz into what he is today,” he declared, his voice deep and cultured.

As the former Major’s eyes swept the room, they lingered on one huge, muscular form.

“Angeal Hewely, isn’t it?”

“Nothing happened!”